Abusive relationships take a toll on the thoughts and physique. Narcissistic and psychopathic companions can have interaction in calculated manipulation strategies to decrease their companions and their self-image. They typically fixate on the perceived flaws or shortcomings of their companions to instill insecurities in them, or manufacture flaws that don’t exist in any respect. That is akin to metaphorically putting a funhouse mirror in entrance of their victims to make them view themselves in a unfavourable gentle.
The sort of distortion can lead an abuse sufferer to develop a distorted self-image that doesn’t mirror their true self precisely. As victims internalize this distorted self-image, this might then lead to a variation of physique dysmorphia or consuming problems in an try to handle the abuse they’re experiencing. Analysis exhibits that there’s a excessive comorbidity between PTSD and consuming problems. As a researcher, I’ve additionally discovered a major affiliation between being in a romantic relationship with somebody excessive in narcissistic traits and PTSD signs associated to the connection. One potential method people who’re in such relationships would possibly react to the stress of their trauma signs is thru disordered consuming or different maladaptive makes an attempt to regain management over their our bodies throughout instances of perceived powerlessness.
Having corresponded with hundreds of survivors who’ve been in relationships with narcissistic and psychopathic people, I’ve seen frequent studies of survivors who’ve suffered a distorted self-image after being on this type of poisonous relationship. As well as, some have skilled drastic bodily adjustments and well being points throughout or within the aftermath of such relationships, whereas others additionally expertise an anxious preoccupation with their look after being emotionally and psychologically abused. The stress of persistent emotional, psychological and even bodily and sexual abuse may lead to direct bodily adjustments, a few of which could be linked to disordered consuming or stress. Survivors of abuse could achieve extra weight, probably as a consequence of altering cortisol and insulin ranges in response to emphasize or as a consequence of overeating as a way to self-soothe in the course of the abuse cycle. Alternatively, they might shed some pounds quickly as a consequence of self-neglect and self-deprivation ensuing from impaired self-care.
The Relationship Between Consuming Issues and Abuse
A systematic assessment of the analysis literature confirmed that consuming problems are related to a excessive prevalence and elevated lifetime danger of experiencing intimate associate violence, though extra analysis is required to find out the route of causality. Current analysis additionally signifies that consuming problems amongst adolescents are related to numerous totally different traumas, together with home violence and bullying, with bullying being essentially the most prevalent kind of trauma.
Consuming problems which will consequence as a consequence of abuse or bullying can embody anorexia nervosa (severely restrictive consuming), bulimia nervosa (binge-eating adopted by self-induced vomiting, purging or fasting), and binge-eating dysfunction (consuming extreme quantities of meals in a brief time period, typically uncontrollably).
Different habits that accompany disordered consuming in an abusive relationship could embody: (1) extreme train to the purpose of exhaustion as a type of self-punishment after consuming (2) proscribing meals consumption intentionally to emotionally “numb” the ache of the abuse (3) limiting meals consumption to suit a sure health excellent to please the abusive associate (particularly if the abusive associate engages in degrading comparisons to different physique varieties), or (4) omitting sure meals from one’s weight-reduction plan as a consequence of policing by the abuser (reminiscent of persistently crucial feedback about one’s weight-reduction plan).
What’s Physique Dysmorphic Dysfunction?
Physique dysmorphic dysfunction is a psychological well being situation the place a person displays an intense preoccupation with perceived flaws of their look (whether or not actual or imagined). In response to analysis, intimate associate violence in maturity, notably the severity of sexual coercion, bodily assault and psychological abuse, has been considerably related to elevated physique disgrace and self-objectification. Longitudinal analysis signifies that folks with physique dysmorphic dysfunction additionally report a higher severity of childhood maltreatment, abuse and neglect, particularly emotional neglect and emotional abuse. They might have additionally skilled bodily or sexual abuse in childhood.
As a researcher, I’ve heard from some survivors who point out that they’ve skilled some variation of physique dysmorphia or physique picture points because of the abuse they skilled from narcissistic or psychopathic associate, even when they don’t meet the complete standards for physique dysmorphic dysfunction as a analysis. Being in a poisonous relationship may exacerbate physique picture points that existed previous to the connection as properly. Physique dysmorphia could also be particularly obvious in a survivor who has been nitpicked on their look by a narcissistic or psychopathic associate, particularly in reference to sure options of their physique or face.
Narcissistic and psychopathic people can “distort” the options of their companions by making bullying remarks that exaggerate these options negatively or by making persistent, hypercritical feedback about their associate’s look generally. This could trigger their victims to query and doubt themselves, main them to develop an intense preoccupation with “fixing” perceived flaws which will or could not even exist. It could additionally result in “checking” behaviors the place survivors are consumed with their look to make sure there’s nothing improper with it.
Though extra analysis must be carried out on the associations amongst consuming problems, physique dysmorphia and the expertise of intimate associate violence by narcissistic or psychopathic companions, it’s clear that emotional and psychological abuse by such companions can create or exacerbate struggles with physique picture and shallowness. You probably have been abused by a narcissistic or psychopathic associate and are struggling along with your psychological well being, you aren’t alone and assistance is on the market. Talking with a trauma-informed psychological well being skilled and interesting in mind-body therapeutic modalities can empower you and allow you to to regain mastery over your thoughts and physique.